Thursday, November 18, 2010

"It's Just A Milkshake"

You know I must be pregnant when my blog features two images of desserts within the same week. Well, this image is actually in reference to a line I heard on the second-to-last episode of the T.V. show MAD MAN this past season. It was said by Don's secretary, who he took with him to help watch his kids during a business trip to California. They all were eating out at a restaurant and his kids started to fight. One of them accidentally tipped over a milkshake, which spilled all over their entire table. Don was embarrassed and about to get really upset when the camera then zoomed in on the secretary as she shrugged and said "It's just a milkshake" ever-so nonchalantly. Don stared at her in disbelief obviously impressed with her ability to stay calm under pressure, and her ability to keep a realistic perspective on the silly little things that kids do.

As I watched that scene I too was impressed. I made a mental note to remember that line, her disposition, and the way it all worked out just fine. That had been working until we (Benjamin and I) went to the grocery store, and I momentarily lost him in public for the first time.

Let's first back up to that morning. 

As normal I was feeding him his oatmeal in his highchair. He spotted an orange elastic on my wrist and pointed at it. I normally don't hand over such chokable objects, but I was right there watching him and he was starting to get a little fussy, so I gave in because I wanted him to finish his oatmeal. He later dropped it on the ground and amidst all of the other fallen debris, I forgot about it. He did not because when I took him out of his highchair he dove for it first thing. At that moment I had to run to the bathroom and didn't feel like fighting him for it, so I just looked at him and said: "Don't eat that" because toddlers always listen when told, right? When I came out of the bathroom I saw Benjamin but no orange hair elastic. I immediately searched the floor, his toys, his clothes, then his mouth. He must have eaten it thought. Great. Now I have to google how long it takes for a nylon covered rubber object to decompose in one's body, or would it come out in his ? No signs of any of it in his mouth, so where could this darn elastic be? I called Bart who reminded me to check the garbage. Not what I wanted to do that morning but I was getting a little frantic by this point, so I put plastic baggies on my hands and dug while Benjamin stood there and smiled at me. Lots of orange carrots, but no orange elastic. Ugh. Why, why, why did I give it to him I kept thinking?! I then remembered that while I was in the bathroom I heard Benjamin. I heard him right by the door. So I got down to his height right by the door and voila, there was the orange hair elastic underneath the dryer. A few hours later, I got us dressed and ready to battle the grocery store...

(this is not my child, but this is the type of car/cart combo I'm referring to in the below story...)
About 45 min. into our shopping trip (I take awhile to shop...) Benjamin started to get a little antsy. I even had him strapped in the car part of the cart (see above pic), but he was slowly getting less entertained by the steering wheel that doesn't actually steer (thank goodness!). I only had a few more things to get so I thought he could sit tight, but he proved me wrong. On a quick jaunt by myself down one of the aisles (those huge and awkward car carts don't fit down all of them!) I returned to every parents worst nightmare....the vision of an empty object their child was once occupying. My heart skipped a beat. I quickly realized that he must have squirmed his way out of the seat buckle because it was still clasped. I then got a rush of adrenaline/mom power that told me to move fast- he can't be that far. To keep myself from hyperventilating, I told myself he had to only be one aisle away....he was three. Thankfully, he was found by another mother who saw him walking the aisles all by himself and distracted him with a Santa toy. I ran up to him obviously relieved but embarrassed and told her thank you, thank you and that he had NEVER been lost in public before. She smiled and ever-so nonchalantly said, "Oh happens to us all the time!" Now a spilled milkshake I can get over, a missing hair elastic I felt really guilty about, but losing my child in public....NOOOOO! She looked like a very responsible and cute mom, with a cute and non-wandering child in her shopping cart who I think was just trying to make me feel better by saying that because no parent can really chance their child wandering off all the time? Let's hope. 

While hoping, let's also figure out a way for busy moms to keep their homes stocked with fresh food because I don't know about the rest of you, but it seems like we have to go to the grocery store a lot and I am now beginning to dread it. When I lived in Chicago they had a service where you could grocery shop online and have it delivered, which I did once! It was pricey but worth it. Until that luxury comes here I guess I'm going to have to buy more in bulk, or leave Benjamin safe at home....that is until he comes across that orange hair elastic. 


  1. Thank you for being a REAL mom and sharing this story. We all have had parenting moments we wished had never happened. I am SO glad Benjamin is safe and sound. I hate the BusCart. I always have to use them at the grocery store now and they are so hard to maneuver - like you said. If I can I shop early in the AM or late now so I can leave the kids at home. It is some nice "me" time to read labels and look at the 17 different types of pasta if I want to.

  2. I also loved the "It's just a milkshake" line. We forget that things aren't so important and I know I am guilty if "freaking" out far too quickly. Glad Benjamin is safe and sound too!